Have you discovered a great profile on an online dating portal such as Tinder or Parship and would like to write to your chosen one? Maybe you have even already exchanged likes when using a free dating site chat. Now it is important to write a good first message. In addition to the profile picture and meaningful profile texts, a perfect first message is often decisive for whether you get an answer on a free dating site to chat.
So, we have prepared some tips to arouse a member’s interest with humor and naturalness, among other things, and perhaps not stay single for too long.
Top tips on how to write a nice first message on a dating service
During free dating site chatting on any platform (be it dating sites gays, lesbian sites, or traditional platforms), you should pay attention to the following points for every message you send:
- Be personal and always polite.
- Keep it short, and don’t write long novels.
- Be humorous and attentive.
- Avoid irony.
Here are some tips on what you should consider when sending a message to a woman for the first time.
Write something personal when communicating on an adult dating site
Nothing is worse than a message that is impersonally formulated and not exactly aimed at the recipient. A partner then easily gets the feeling that you may have sent this message to him and several people. To avoid this, you should formulate your first message as individually and personally as possible. The recipient must feel personally addressed. Then your chances of getting an answer will also increase.
For example, respond to a person’s interests and hobbies. Maybe you even share some of them and have a first topic of conversation.
Alternatively, you can also look closely at the online profile with the profile texts and ask interested questions about the information.
Examples of first messages
Here are some examples of how you can write a personal first message.
- Hello, I saw in your profile pictures that you had visited Thailand. I also recently went on vacation there. I particularly liked the city of Bangkok. How did you like it in Thailand?
- Your profile shows that you like to go skating. I just discovered this hobby for myself. Maybe we’ll go for a walk together?
- I have noticed you have a bike. What do you like the most about this activity?
Draw attention to yourself
The first impression is often the most important online. So show yourself as realistically and naturally as possible. Don’t overdo it with your positive qualities, but don’t reveal all your weaknesses immediately. Just behave as if you were addressing a woman on the street when you first message a woman.
Be open and honest, but don’t attack your lady with personal details that might only be entrusted to good friends. There is still time for this later. Just reveal so much that the other person becomes aware of you and wants to know more about you.
Very important: don’t just talk about yourself, but also ask questions so you don’t come across as self-centered and selfish.
W-questions that begin with how, why, etc., are particularly helpful here. Your chosen one cannot answer yes or no to these questions but must write a little more.
Examples:
- “How was your holiday in Italy?”
- “What do you particularly like about skiing, etc.?”
Be brief
Initially, no one wants to read pages of text when starting the journey on an international dating site. Especially for the first message, you should be rather brief, but it should not be a one-liner.
About 5 to 10 sentences should be enough to introduce yourself and make the recipient curious.
In your first message, focus on entertaining information that arouses positive feelings/emotions in the reader. Questions about hobbies, holiday wishes, and pets are preferred to be answered rather than complex, personal topics, such as children’s wishes, plans, or questions about the ex.
Therefore, never ask questions about the desire to have children and other topics that could overwhelm the potential partner. You can exchange ideas about this later on the first date or, better, on the second date.
Don’t forget a nice salutation and a personal farewell word, especially with the first message. Good grammar and spelling are also important.
Otherwise, your first message will quickly look superficial, or you will immediately be labeled illiterate.
Humor matters
Women like funny men, and men also emphasize a sense of humor. Being able to laugh together is often at the top of the wish list for many people when looking for a partner.
Small anecdotes from your life are ideal for giving a first impression of yourself and creating a relaxed atmosphere for further communication.
Find similarities
Are you both fans of Harry Potter, or are both super sporty? Search for possible similarities in the profile text, on pictures, or in the bio and discuss these similarities. “Hey, I saw you are also a Harry Potter fan. When do you think a new movie will be released? “
On the one hand, you emphasize your common hobbies, attitudes to life, etc., and also make it easy for the other person to answer because he knows the topic.
Conclusion
Understandably, even the best free dating website cannot guarantee you will find a soulmate quickly: when using any free web dating site, you must stick to safety and communication rules. Adult dating sites (as well as international dating sites) are numerous nowadays, so choose the one you like the most and have fun!
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